Why Coffee Chats Matter More Than We Think

Source: https://admission.princeton.edu/blogs/why-coffee-chats-matter-more-we-think Parent: https://admission.princeton.edu/undergraduate-student-blog

December 21, 2025

Jocelyne Wijaya '26

Hi everyone! My name is Jocelyne and I am originally from Los Angeles, California. I'm a Junior in the Politics department and am heavily involved in the Princeton community. You’ll find me as a part of several organizations here, including Matriculate, Scholars of Finance, the Office of Innovation, Mendel Music Library, and Marquand Art Library. When I'm not doing work, you can find me trying new coffee shops or looking for new places to eat. I

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Over the past four years of my time at Princeton, I’ve spent a decent amount of time reaching out to people — strangers, alumni, and acquaintances — for all sorts of reasons. When I entered college, I was not aware of the importance of networking, whether for professional or personal pursuits. Four years later, I cannot overemphasize how much networking has become a part of my life; in addition to opening doors that were previously locked to me, it has also put me in contact with people who have played a significant role in shaping the trajectory of my life.

Up til most recently, I had always been on the “asking” end of the coffee chats. However, a few days ago, I had the privilege of being on the opposite side of the conversation, answering questions about the summer internship that I had pursued in my junior year.

It was interesting to be the one answering, and not asking, the questions. Initially, I had anticipated an absence of the bundle of nerves that I typically experience when initiating any networking conversation. In my mind, I had thought that being on the opposite end would place my disquieting brain at ease. However, as the day for my coffee chat loomed closer, I found myself thinking through all the times I had mustered the courage to ask someone to have a conversation with me and how each conversation had left me profoundly better off than before in terms of knowledge, confidence, and/or accessibility to support.

I suddenly was overcome with a profound feeling of gratitude for not only having had the opportunity to maybe help, enlighten, or simply inform someone else, but also for having been on the receiving end of these conversations. Being on the opposite end of the coffee chat, I was struck with a desire to ensure that I could be of as much help as possible and to pay homage to a community of people who had taken time out of their lives to help me as well.

If there was one thing I wish I knew before starting college, it would be to cherish these conversations a little more. When I was younger, coffee chats felt more like an obligation to me than anything else. However, I experienced a shift in mindset when I started to see these conversations as more of an opportunity to learn something new and less of a formality. It was more than a shift in mindset, too; it was a feeling — a sense of emotion that these chats, whether they served helpful or not, were a really great chance to meet someone new and broaden one’s network.

While there may be a lot of opportunities to meet new people in your life, there are few times we get to sit down and have a conversation with someone to learn more about them in a formal capacity. These moments offer a meaningful time of exchange, more than stepping stones towards a job or an opportunity, but also a chance to learn more about the human experience and how it manifests itself for others.